very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
