This girl is more easily done than said...
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
Brb crying the tears of my youth
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
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