First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
My breath smells like gin and sadness
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
