I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize
