The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
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