what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Randomize
