In the future we'll all be gay
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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