Dude my mom stole all your condoms
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
Randomize