Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
Randomize
