"it" just moved
If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
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