your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
