i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
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