I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
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