dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
Randomize