Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
I'm just going to tell you this I knocked up your girlfriend. I didn't mean to I thought it was somebody else I wasn't drunk but it was dark.
The truth is better her than my wife.
Randomize
