Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
Randomize
