Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
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