Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
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