i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize
