yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
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