I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
I can't turn off my feet"
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
Randomize
