You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
Randomize
