Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
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I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
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