I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Randomize
