Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Randomize
