If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
Randomize
