Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
