I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
This is my gift to your gina
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
