The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
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