Tell her she can't have a vagina
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
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