rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
The cards I get dealt on tinder now are karma for fucking a married man while I was in high school.
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