ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
Randomize
