New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Randomize
