**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
Randomize
