Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
Randomize
