paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
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