if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Randomize
