I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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