I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Randomize
