So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
Randomize
