made out with the bouncer to distract him from how illegitimate my fake id is.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Randomize
