Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
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