I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
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