oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
Randomize