thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
My ass is underappreciated
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
Randomize
