Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
Where is the hickey?
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize
