god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
I wish I only lived at night.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
Randomize
