I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Randomize
