im drinking this country out of the recession.
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
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