So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
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